Wednesday, August 26, 2009

If you cant say something nice.....

You know the old saying, everybody has been told it at one point in their life. Well, it sums up how I feel about almost everything. I don't have alot of nice to say about anything. I am in a 3 year rut. Grumpy, sad, pissed, sad, angry, sad, sad and sad. Depressed, I am sure.

What I can't seem to get over is "accepting" my life the way it is. I am sick of it and I know that those around me have to be too. I don't really talk about it much anymore because nothing new really comes out of my mouth. Repeat, repeat and repeat.

I am still on my boycott, being mad at God. But....it is exhausting and overwhelming. It is time for me to get over myself and start to figure out what God has for me. I am actually desperate for it, living thru this anger is tooo much work.

I recently read a blog of another couple that lost their daughter when she was two days old. Their faith in God is actually unbelievable to me, cannot even remotely image myself being that dependant on God. Believing and hoping that my Faith can grow to be like that is inspiring. Here is their story.

God wants more for me and from me.

1 comment:

Melis.sa said...

Jeremiah 29:11 has been a rock for me this year (loss of a friend to suicide, two miscarriages, my mom's diagnosis of breast cancer, my dad moving across the country..)

((HUGS))